A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidently bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast.
They are both quite startled.
The man turns to her and says,
"Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know you'll forgive me."
She replies,
"If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 1221."
Panting and perspiring, two men on a tandem bicycle finnaly reached the top of a steep hill.
"That was a steep climb,"says the first man.
"It certainly was,"replies the second man.
"And if I hadn't kept the brake on, we would have slid down backward."
A boy had reached 4 without giving up on the habit of sucking his thumb, though his mother had tried everything from bribery to reasoning to painting it with lemon juice to discourage the habit.
Finally, she tried threats, warning her son that,
"If you do not stop sucking your thumb, your stomach is going to blow up like a balloon."
Later that day, walking in the park, mother and son saw a pregnant woman sitting on a bench.
The four-year-old considered her gravely for a minute, then spoke to her, saying,
"Uh-oh... I know what you've been doing."
A rather attractive woman goes up to the bar in a quiet rural pub.
She gestures alluringly to the barman, who comes over immediately.
When he arrives, she seductively signals for him to bring his face close to hers.
When he does so, she gently begins to caress his beard, which is bushy and full.
"Are you the manager?" she asks, softly stroking his face with both hands.
"Actually, no," he replies.
"Can you get him for me -- I need to speak to him."
She is running her hands up beyond his beard and into his hair.
"I'm afraid that I can't," breathes the barman, clearly aroused. "Is there anything I can do?"
"Yes, there is. I need you to give him a message," she continues huskily, popping a couple of fingers into his mouth and allowing him to suck them gently.
"Tell him that there is no toilet paper in the ladies room."
LOOOOOL !
farny luh .
here are some china photos (:
our super cool suzhou tour guide (:
retarted me t.t
me and my sister, eunice (:
i call this - "SISTER ; DEEP IN THOUGHT"
and lastly, my dear daugher, becky (: ain't she cute
next time then post more .. hahha
XOXO